The Workplace Response To ‘Porch Piracy’

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By: Jonathan Dahl, Chief Content Officer

The first Broadway show I ever saw, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying, featured a character named J. Pierrepont Finch who manages, via lots of clever maneuvering, to rise all the way from mailroom clerk to chairman of the board. Though I saw it decades ago, scenes from the show flooded my mind recently when a reporter friend asked me if I’d ever heard of “porch piracy.” Turns out, some $9 billion in delivered packages are now stolen each year from people’s front porches, creating an enormous headache for giant retailers—a frustrating crime wave they’re trying to fight using all sorts of high-tech gadgets and AI tracking tools.

The real story, though, is how homeowners seem to have come up with a solution of their own—which is giving companies an entirely different kind of headache, and perhaps a new role for the J. Pierrepont Finches of the world.

I shall explain. With so many people frustrated by the thievery, at least some have resorted to quietly shipping personal purchases to a safer place: their office. It’s yet another side issue that has cropped up as companies institute return-to-office (RTO) policies. For a worker who’s glum about their commute, the thinking seems to be pretty simple: At least my workplace can provide a safe haven for that prized candleholder coming from Amazon.

According to a survey by Capital One Shopping, independent companies currently ship a staggering 1.37 million packages per day—equivalent to 57,083 per hour. So it’s not as if workplaces aren’t already handling plenty of packages. What’s more, the practice seems to have created a new HR issue, given that different companies have different policies about receiving personal packages at work. Ever hear of “coffee badging”? That’s when an employee, perhaps facing family-care commitments or fed up with their company waffling on RTO, only comes into work to swipe their badge before heading back home. Could this be the beginning of “package badging?”

But what really drew my attention was the workers in the mailroom. It’s true—many firms have been outsourcing their mail functions, but plenty still maintain a good number of workers to sift through and deliver mail to employees’ desks. My own personal experience is that these folks work pretty hard, are exceptionally nice, and are well informed about their workplaces. They’re the people you seek out when you want to know who’s new in the office—and who has left. In this crazy new world of remote and hybrid, they’re also the folks who’ll know, just by glancing at the mailing label, who’s receiving personal packages at the office.

Which all brings me back to J. Pierrepont Finch. The key to his success was that no one saw him coming as he climbed the executive ladder. If you happen to be shipping your holiday gifts to the office, I might pay a little more attention to these kinds of folks.

Photo credits: Seamartini/Getty Images